I love working with women who compulsively overeat. There is a reason why I love this work so much, because the results are very tangible and easy to notice. A shift in eating patterns tells me that the problem – whatever it was – is gone! And the shift is always obvious; they feel motivated to eat healthy with no struggle. It just becomes naturally easy. (more…)CONTINUE READING
I want to talk about emotions today.
First of all, I would invite you to inspect closely your own reaction to the word ‘emotion’. Because words are not just empty symbols describing something objective out there. They carry meaning. Lots of meanings and lots of associations. And they can tell you about the cultural influences that you have been exposed to, the society that molded, sculpted your psyche. (more…)CONTINUE READING
I hope you understand more about the importance of moods and emotions in the way you react to things. In fact they are important in all decision making processes. They influence how you see interactions, situations and events in your life and how you see others. And it influences how you react to what people say to you.
And of course you know that. You know that when you are in a bad mood, or disappointed with yourself in some ways, no matter how nice people are (and no matter how hard your partner tries to make you feel loved), you just don’t feel it anyway. It feels that they must be lying or trying too hard, and even if they are completely genuine in their affection, you just don’t trust it. (more…)CONTINUE READING
Have you ever tried to understand – or to change – your emotional responses to situations or to behaviours of others, only to feel more confused than ever. Have you tried to feel better about your body, your weight, your friends, your family, your work and yet couldn’t change any of that? Have you tried to be more positive only to end up feeling even more frustrated with yourself? (more…)CONTINUE READING
Do you sabotage yourself with food?
Do you love food too much? Do you find yourself eating more than you want, or not being able to stop snacking? Do you find yourself bingeing on foods, unable to stop until the whole box, a block or a packet is gone? (more…)CONTINUE READING
Rosie had Bulimia since she could remember. This is why she was thrilled when she was free from it, finally! She loved the feeling of being in control, something she hasn’t experienced for a long time. You saved my live, she said to me in the last session, it feels so new to me, I want to run outside and just do things! she shouted. Her energy was palpable. I knew exactly what she was experiencing. This surge of energy always comes when we genuinely let go. She wasn’t used to it and it still felt like an exaggerated sense of vitality, something she could hardly contain. (more…)CONTINUE READING
Can you see yourself in any of these statements below?
Every time I get stressed I tend to eat chocolate, too much chocolate. I don’t seem to have much control over it, and often can’t stop until the whole block is gone. (You could replace ‘chocolate’ with any other food, if you like).
I overeat at night.I keep snacking after dinner, even though I am completely full, I keep going to the fridge or pantry and eating, eating, eating. It takes a lot of will power to stop, and often I cant stop until I go to bed, or until i feel sick. (more…)CONTINUE READING
My view on overeating and binge eating is very simple; it is about emotional discomfort that you are so used to, you don’t even notice any more. It is not about a-date-gone-wrong-so-i-cry-in-the-bucket-of-ice-cream, it is not about what happened today or even yesterday. It is about a more chronic, ongoing, consistent feeling of slight mental and emotional off-ness.CONTINUE READING
In my last post I talked about why all behaviours have some purpose or logic behind them. I hopefully convinced you that there may be some reason why we behave in certain ways, even if the behaviours are not what we want. I also told you that often the seemingly irrational behaviours create a pressure valve that, temporarily at least, eases off some emotional hurt you may feel. And the quickest way to recovery is finding more constructive ways of easing off the pressure. Preferably, by changing how we feel permanently. But to do this, you may need to understand emotions a little bit more. Especially negative emotions, where they come from and how to change them. (more…)CONTINUE READING
I want to share a few points that is central to my work as a therapist. I would like to start with a very important (in my view) premise that every single behaviour, no matter how weird or illogical, is in fact logical and purposeful. It may not appear logical, and it may go against what you rationally want. But it doesn’t change the fact that, considering what goes on inside your mind, this behaviour serves a purpose. There is a reason for it to take place. (more…)CONTINUE READING