NLP stands for ‘Neurolinguistic Programming’ and is a set of coaching and motivational techniques that help to ‘re-program’ cognitive habits. And with changed thinking comes changed behaviour. But also mental clarity and confidence.
NLP is exceptionally helpful in changing the way we think and feel, and is used to release unwanted mental habits, behaviours and limiting beliefs, as well as in accelerating success. As a set of tools, NLP provides a great short-cut to transforming lives in a relatively brief time.
Who can benefit from NLP
We all have an some habitual ways of thinking that limit our effectiveness and success. And we all could benefit from clearing those limiting patterns. But for some of us, these techniques can be a real life-savour, giving freedom from self-sabotaging behaviours, anxiety, depression, insecurity or addictions.
Compulsive behaviours, addictions, feeling our of control and trapped in their situations, feeling exhausted from mental chatter and ‘going in circles’ can be effectively resolved with NLP.
But the techniques that NLP offers are not enough to transform the mind. To achieve the transformation NLP promises, it takes more than just applying one of many exercises. Some tools work in the almost magical ways. But there is more than just quick techniques to permanent positive change.
The conscious and the subconscious
All behaviours are driven by your mind, your thinking, goals, desires and beliefs you hold. When subconscious programming and conscious goals are in alignment, we soar and achieve what we want. Easily.
However, sometimes they seem to work against each other. You want to be more motivated, more disciplined, more confident, and yet, you find yourself trapped by fears, procrastination and insecurity. And no matter how hard you try, you keep repeating the same pattern.
To truly break the pattern, you need to change the subconscious programming. The programs that drive self-sabotage. But you also want to know how to catch yourself in the future, if you ever start slipping back into old thinking patterns. You want to understand how to maintain the happy union between the conscious decisions and subconscious support. And this takes more than just a few NLP tricks or a quick hypnosis.
In other words, you want the get to a place where you live more consciously and more in the NOW, where you trust yourself, accept yourself wholeheartedly and really enjoy your life. And this is what I try to give to each and every one of my clients.
My style of NLP
Today, years after I started, I developed my own way of delivering and using NLP to change my clients lives. In fact, I added many other tools and focus of my work changed from relying on cognitive images and mental gymnastics to techniques that ensue deep emotional transformation.
Yes, my focus today is mainly on emotions as they lie at the base of everything we do, every behaviour and every bit of success or failure. They are – it may surprise you – what motivates us and drives us all day long. They are also a brilliant short-cut to the subconscious and therefore help to shift the ways we think.
You may be wondering what I mean by emotions. Isn’t it just what therapists do, talking about feelings all day long? How is it different?
The way i approach emotions is very different. I don’t reminiscent with my clients about how things felt for the sake of ‘getting in touch with the feeling side of things’. My aim is to change how the emotional basis from which we act. If you behave in compulsive ways, if you do things you don’t want to do, it means negative emotions are driving your behaviour. It may be frustration, powerlessness, rage, despair, fear or guilt – these emotions are the reason you self-sabotage or develop addictive, compulsive behaviours.
Those emotions get triggered all day long. For example, something happened in the past that made you feel resentful (like a unwanted divorce) and millions of things a day; images, TV shows, names, colours, happy couples and lawyers, even names can trigger a whole bunch of emotional memories. And they tug on you with their ugly claws, all day long.
Yes, it is true that those emotions come from what you think, but years after an incident you don’t seem to think about it consciously any more. and yet, some ‘essence’ of what you think and believe stays with you. It appears as brief images that flash trough your mind, or more lasting sensations in your body, like tightness or heaviness, and of course emotional outbursts that make you do things or feel things you would rather not feel.
So even if you consciously don’t think about the past, it can play havoc in your life without you even realising it. It can cause panic attacks or binge eating episodes and you can’t really put your finger on what it is that makes you binge. Or shop, or gamble or drink, or get angry after alcohol.
The only way to change these behaviours, is to deal with this emotional ‘essence’, because trying to find specific thoughts behind it can take a long, long time of trial and error. Most of the time, the singular thoughts are well hidden from any conscious, analytical investigation.
I have learnt in those years of practicing, that there is a simple, yet powerful logic to emotions. They serve a purpose, they are signs pointing out at things we need to know. I have learnt that if you understand why anger or rage is there, then you can use this understanding to free yourself from unwanted behaviours. But if you just hate yourself for it and suspect there must be something wrong, the behaviours and anger will continue. Once you can read the emotions, and see the logic in them, then you can achieve something that is rare. You can find mastery over your life. Because if you can be in control of how you feel, you found the secret to happy life.
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disclaimer: *while these endorsements represent actual as well as typical experiences, the results may vary from person to person